Must have I think for any workout playlist:
Tuesday, January 21, 2014
Thursday, January 16, 2014
Little Sister Is Gettin' Hitched!!!
My little sister is gettin' hitched!
I still can't believe it. Her and her fiance have been in so much in love for so long. He's so good to her. He really is an amazing man. AND he just humors her when she's going off on her rants ("Yes M, I know M, Okay M.") Cracks.me.up. He's her perfect match and I can't be happier.
The kicker? She got engaged beginning of December and her wedding is...
February 22, 2014
As in 30 something days from today!
Its been busy busy with all the planning but she has so much support and so much help planning. Her dress is breathtaking (and a freaking steal!). The maid of honor dresses are lovely (in an Apple red color):
Her centerpieces are designed and set. The menu is set. The flowers are set. The decorations are set (she's doing a rustic/winter wonderland theme). Shoes are set. Its all coming together. And the closer it gets, the more excited I get for it!
MY LITTLE SISTER IS GETTING MARRIED!
We are planning the party and her dinner beforehand. We are still trying to find a DJ so we are all coming together and putting our heads together to figure it out. I still need to write my speech and hope I can get through it without bawling!
Her shower is this weekend, Saturday actually. And while I wish I could be there, she knows I just can't. I hope she knows I am there in spirit. This is just another example of how living away sucks. So many things I am missing and wish I could be there for. I am also just in shock that she is getting married. I remember her being a flower girl at mine! And now its her turn. Where did the time go you know???
Thursday, January 09, 2014
Wednesday, January 08, 2014
Addiction
Addiction.
It tears families apart. Ruins lives. Causes massive amounts of stress. And really when it comes down to it, just causes massive amounts of pain. It eats away at the person addicted and tears apart the families involved.
I used to see addition go through families and I would think to myself "how sad" but it never really affected me personally. My brother and sister were unfortunate to have lost a very good friend to an addiction and that tore them up inside. My cousin lost her brother to an addiction. Then it hit my family directly.
Its hard to watch someone go through that. Its hard to watch the person struggle daily to stay clean and off of it. Its hard to watch them battle the internal demons that they have. Its hard to watch them fight. Every single day its a fight. And it will be until the day he dies.
Its really hard as the big sister. I feel like I should be doing more, I feel like I should be there more. I have had days where i just cry because I feel so bad for him. So bad that he was sucked into this hell that only he can pull himself out of. So sad that this is happening to my little brother, my only brother.
Will he ever be truly happy again? Will he ever smile again? Will he ever love himself again? Did he ever? Will he ever find happiness? Will he ever feel secure enough in his emotions to talk to us instead of resorting to that?
I don't know. But all I can do is pray everyday that he will be. He tells us that he disappoints us but he didn't. We might be upset and sad this is happening but mostly we are worried. Worried that something terrible could happen to him. Worried that this might consume his life to the point of no return.
We all wish we could change this, make him be clean. Make him realize that this is the way. And he knows that. But that is the terrible part of addiction. You can know this is bad, you can know this is terrible. But it consumes your life and takes over your soul. We can only stand back and be there for him, make sure he knows that we help him, help him when we can, be there for him.
Doesn't stop the hurt of wishing we could do more though.
I used to see addition go through families and I would think to myself "how sad" but it never really affected me personally. My brother and sister were unfortunate to have lost a very good friend to an addiction and that tore them up inside. My cousin lost her brother to an addiction. Then it hit my family directly.
Its hard to watch someone go through that. Its hard to watch the person struggle daily to stay clean and off of it. Its hard to watch them battle the internal demons that they have. Its hard to watch them fight. Every single day its a fight. And it will be until the day he dies.
Its really hard as the big sister. I feel like I should be doing more, I feel like I should be there more. I have had days where i just cry because I feel so bad for him. So bad that he was sucked into this hell that only he can pull himself out of. So sad that this is happening to my little brother, my only brother.
Will he ever be truly happy again? Will he ever smile again? Will he ever love himself again? Did he ever? Will he ever find happiness? Will he ever feel secure enough in his emotions to talk to us instead of resorting to that?
I don't know. But all I can do is pray everyday that he will be. He tells us that he disappoints us but he didn't. We might be upset and sad this is happening but mostly we are worried. Worried that something terrible could happen to him. Worried that this might consume his life to the point of no return.
We all wish we could change this, make him be clean. Make him realize that this is the way. And he knows that. But that is the terrible part of addiction. You can know this is bad, you can know this is terrible. But it consumes your life and takes over your soul. We can only stand back and be there for him, make sure he knows that we help him, help him when we can, be there for him.
Doesn't stop the hurt of wishing we could do more though.
Sunday, January 05, 2014
Juicing...my new obsession
So everyone who reads this knows that my 3 day juice cleanse just didn't work out. LOL I just could not go that long without food.
For Christmas I got a juicer...the Hamilton Beach Big Mouth Pro Juice Extractor to be exact (if you're in the market for a juicer, this one is awesome! Highly recommend it!).
I use two websites for now for juicing recipes, but am open to new ideas always. I don't eat near enough fruit and veggies in my life so at least this way I am getting some of what I need. Can always take steps to being healthier right?! So thinking one juice a day...easy. Which so far it has been. Except for cleaning the dang juicer, its been good. So far I have juiced:
Mean Green
1 Cucumber
2 Green Apples
6-8 Kale Leaves
1/2 lemon
1" ginger
4 Celery Stalks
Carrot Apple Ginger
3 Carrots
2 Apples
1" ginger
The carrot apple ginger is my absolute favorite, by far. It was during my "cleanse" and it is now! Debating on making one in the morning or going for a Purple Power Juice....
I use two websites so far for recipes, Reboot with Joe and freutcake. Reboot with Joe has a TON of recipes. And looking over some of them, they leave a tad to the imagination of the taste buds. But then again I am a creature of habit and don't necessarily like trying new things! So honestly debating on challenging myself to try a new recipe once a week. Don't judge a taste by its sounds right? I mean the beet juice sounds just lovely! But then again I have never tried it so who knows.
Whatcha think?
Mean Green
1 Cucumber
2 Green Apples
6-8 Kale Leaves
1/2 lemon
1" ginger
4 Celery Stalks
Carrot Apple Ginger
3 Carrots
2 Apples
1" ginger
The carrot apple ginger is my absolute favorite, by far. It was during my "cleanse" and it is now! Debating on making one in the morning or going for a Purple Power Juice....
I use two websites so far for recipes, Reboot with Joe and freutcake. Reboot with Joe has a TON of recipes. And looking over some of them, they leave a tad to the imagination of the taste buds. But then again I am a creature of habit and don't necessarily like trying new things! So honestly debating on challenging myself to try a new recipe once a week. Don't judge a taste by its sounds right? I mean the beet juice sounds just lovely! But then again I have never tried it so who knows.
Whatcha think?
Friday, December 13, 2013
Friendships
How many people out there are lucky enough to have lifelong friends? Or even childhood friends that have stayed with you throughout the years? The friends that just get you and you know they will be there no matter what?
I remember growing up and I'd fight with one of my friends my Mom would look at me and say "Sweetie, none of this matters. There will be a handful of people that you will always have around and those will be your true friends." And, as much as this kills me to admit, she was right. I am still friends with those girls to this day so obviously our fights weren't too crazy!
One of the cool things about being in the military life, and also can be one of the major downfalls, is making all these new friends...with the understanding that there will be a time that you or them will have to say goodbye. As adults, we keep in contact via phone, text or Facebook but for the kids, its really hard. I've really watched my son struggle with the move and making new friends and it hurts my heart. Because he doesn't understand WHY he can't still see them all the time. Or WHY we can't just go to see them. He'll see them in a couple weeks and I know he is bursting at the seams about it. I know he's young and there will be friends that come and go but I really hope that he keeps these friends, these childhood friends, as long as I did.
I have been in Seattle for about two weeks now and have spent an awesome time with my friends (#amazingfriends....LOL H!!!) but it sucks that once again, I am leaving them. These women can make me laugh like no other. We know that regardless of whatever ups and downs we have, we are there for each other. And that is a major upside to military life. That you get to meet amazing people like I have. But I also don't forget the friends that have come and gone from various bases. M, J, C and S, my four best friends from GA and WA. The three girls that we can go months without talking (which btw never happens with S or I get the "What the heck jerk!!!" message!) and we pick up like there was never a lapse in time.
Really no point to those entry other then sitting here thinking about how much I have missed all my girls and thinking about how blessed I am to have people like that in my life. People that I know will be there for me always. People that I hope when we're old and senile we can laugh at all the crazy memories we have together.
I remember growing up and I'd fight with one of my friends my Mom would look at me and say "Sweetie, none of this matters. There will be a handful of people that you will always have around and those will be your true friends." And, as much as this kills me to admit, she was right. I am still friends with those girls to this day so obviously our fights weren't too crazy!
One of the cool things about being in the military life, and also can be one of the major downfalls, is making all these new friends...with the understanding that there will be a time that you or them will have to say goodbye. As adults, we keep in contact via phone, text or Facebook but for the kids, its really hard. I've really watched my son struggle with the move and making new friends and it hurts my heart. Because he doesn't understand WHY he can't still see them all the time. Or WHY we can't just go to see them. He'll see them in a couple weeks and I know he is bursting at the seams about it. I know he's young and there will be friends that come and go but I really hope that he keeps these friends, these childhood friends, as long as I did.
I have been in Seattle for about two weeks now and have spent an awesome time with my friends (#amazingfriends....LOL H!!!) but it sucks that once again, I am leaving them. These women can make me laugh like no other. We know that regardless of whatever ups and downs we have, we are there for each other. And that is a major upside to military life. That you get to meet amazing people like I have. But I also don't forget the friends that have come and gone from various bases. M, J, C and S, my four best friends from GA and WA. The three girls that we can go months without talking (which btw never happens with S or I get the "What the heck jerk!!!" message!) and we pick up like there was never a lapse in time.
Really no point to those entry other then sitting here thinking about how much I have missed all my girls and thinking about how blessed I am to have people like that in my life. People that I know will be there for me always. People that I hope when we're old and senile we can laugh at all the crazy memories we have together.
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